Melissa Gorga is a Pathological Liar Who Most Likely Suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder

“Teresa has kept my husband, Joe, and his family (me and my three children) away from everything she has been going through and everything that has been so exciting in her life for the last three years… She kept us as far away during season 1 and season 2, because I think she knew this would happen when they found us. Karma is a bitch… Teresa likes to be the center of attention. Be beneath her or get the hell out of her way. Well she has met her match! … My sisters and Joe have an amazing relationship. He feels they act more like sisters to him than his own does… he is completely disappointed with the way she treats him and his family.” – Melissa Gorga, No Fakers, May 16, 2011

“Teresa’s never given us any respect… I think when Joe and I started making a lot of money is when she really lost it. She was used to being the biggest and the best, and then when I came in, she felt threatened. She doesn’t want anyone to one up her. Teresa’s fine with you as long as you’re one step below.” – Melissa Gorga, Life & Style, May 18, 2011

“[Melissa Gorga] Missy was at nearly every single family function, especially the ones filmed for Bravo. For years, she sent Bravo ‘audition’ tapes, e-mails, and even spoke with producers and assistants in person. No one was interested in her or her husband, who they mocked behind the scenes… The day of the reunion [season 2], after the first Danielle confrontation (there were more), Tre got extreme anxiety – and this is when she started to put all of Missy’s motives together: coming to every family event for camera time while behind the scenes contacting producers, Danielle, and pulling the best act [their Soprano's-style audition tape] which got her on the show – together with Tre’s brother Joey.” – RHONJ Insider, Comment Posted at Reality Tea, September 17, 2011

“I met the brother of the Montville housewife [Teresa]. What an awesome guy, very successful, owns alot of buildings, and he is her younger brother. He is very young. Wow!! His house is the most amazing house in Montville, in a very prestigious development. It’s an OMG! Cribs doesn’t even have houses like that. He has a beautiful wife and family; she is only 29! living in a house like that! God Bless. If the Montville housewife is anything like her brother, she should be interesting. I’m sure she will be; they must come from a great family. I know of some of the other girls.” – Melissa Gorga, Commenting ‘Anonymously’ About Herself and Her Husband, December 21, 2008

Joe and Melissa Gorga were angry that they weren’t benefiting from Teresa’s fame. Melissa Gorga stalked Bravo’s producers for three years, campaigning to get on The Real Housewives of New Jersey, but it wasn’t until she stalked Danielle Staub that she finally succeeded in getting Bravo to cast her. Had Teresa Giudice not reacted to Danielle when she brought up Melissa and her lies during reunion 2 (many lies were told, but only the one about Teresa ’not acknowledging her nephew’s birth’ made the cut), Bravo would have continued to reject Melissa as a potential cast member because they thought she was boring.

Here is Melissa’s tweet (and her sister’s tweet) after Danielle’s ‘nephew’ comment during reunion 2, which infuriated Teresa:

Melissa Marco-Gorga Wow Wow Wow!!!!
August 30, 2010

Lysa Marco-Simpson what happen…………hit a nerve?
August 30, 2010

There were many lies from Melissa that Danielle repeated during the filming of reunion 2, but only the ‘nephew’ comment make the final cut.

Reunion 2: The Scoop from an Insider Commenting at Reality Tea on September 17, 2011:

“There was so much of what is now relevant information edited out of the reunion last year [season 2] because, at the time, it was irrelevant. Danielle used Melissa’s name verbatim, and among many other things, discussed Tre ‘not speaking or associating with her own family’ and being a horrible aunt [the same accusation Melissa made in her sixth Bravo blog, Light at the End of the Tunnel, posted on June 21, 2011].

“When Teresa was arguing with Danielle, which was edited down, she CLEARLY told Danielle Staub to not ‘break up’ her family – not ‘bring up’ her family as she tried to assure us. This is why… the day of the reunion [season 2], after the first Danielle confrontation (there were more), Tre got extreme anxiety – and this is when she started to put all of Missy’s motives together: coming to every family event for camera time while behind the scenes contacting producers, Danielle, and pulling the best act which got her on the show – together with Tre’s brother Joey.”

“Teresa said she got mad at the country club (after the Posche Fashion Show in season 2) when Danielle said her house was in foreclosure because Danielle was snooping around in her business. The truth was that it was Melissa talking to Danielle. Melissa wanted Danielle to befriend her like she did Kim G, but Danielle was too smart for this. Danielle was right. Bravo ended up replacing her with Melissa, after all.” [Ragin'Cajun, Reality Tea, April 20, 2012]

“Not only was Danielle getting fed information about Teresa and Juicy’s personal issues but so was Kim G and Monica, the attorney suing Teresa and Juicy. Lookers Dancers has proven to me that she will do anything and everything to take Teresa down so she can be the star of the show and the family. Personally, I think the sole reason Teresa was waiting in the chair outside the bathroom at the S2 fashion show was to find out how Danielle was getting all her information and who she was telling the information to. Things were going down hill quickly at that point and she knew someone was selling her out but she didn’t know who it was. Danielle held the secret of who the rat was. We all know now that Looker Dancer was feeding information to DS.” [old NJ girl, AllAboutTRH.com, May 20, 2012]

It’s a good thing that not all of Teresa’s friends or family members think like Joe and Melissa… if they did, Bravo would have been inundated with audition tapes promising to destroy Teresa.

“Kim G and Ashley’s boyfriend were in scenes with Jacqueline because she had nothing going on in her life, but that doesn’t mean every other cast member needs to start adding people to their scenes. By this reasoning, Caroline’s 9 other siblings should be pissed at her, Dina and Chris. I mean, 3 of their siblings are on TV and 9 aren’t. The nerve! Teresa had her family there. What gets shown is up to the producers. Did she make her brother, his wife, her sisters, her cousins and their families an integral part of her scenes in S1 and S2? No. She wanted to show off herself, her daughters and her marriage (for better or worse). And she did. Shrug. I don’t think any of those are valid reasons for the Gorgas to resent Teresa unless they are famewhores first and family second.” [Lola16, TelevisionWithoutPity.com, May 19, 2012]

When the Gorgas signed their Bravo contract and joined the show, they promised to bring family drama and to ‘expose’ and ‘destroy’ Teresa with total disregard for the well being of Joe’s parents, sister and nieces. Melissa and Joe have no shame. Melissa sold out her husband’s family, with his blessing, for a shot at fame. The Gorgas love fame more than family.

No matter how much they protest, it’s obvious that Joe and Melissa Gorga, both narcissists, were very angry that they were not included in season 1 and season 2 of RHONJ, and they blame Teresa Giudice for this even though Bravo chose not to cast them or include any clips of them in prior seasons. [Read Melissa's first Bravo blog No Fakers — see excerpts below — for evidence of their envy and delusion.]

These two narcissists were filled with hatred and envy over Teresa’s fame and success, believing it should have been them and not her in the spotlight. What they fail to realize about Teresa’s success is this: although plucked from obscurity like all the other cast members, Teresa became a star in her own right because of her charisma. Simply being cast does not guarantee you fame and fortune; the viewers decide that…Teresa gained her fans on her own merit. Joe and Melissa expected instant superstar status: during their first season, without having a fan base, they shoved Melissa’s music in the viewers’ faces. Before anyone outside her tiny circle knew her name (they call her “Lady Gorga,” she thinks she’s the next JLo, and she and her sisters consider themselves the new Kardashians), Melissa had professional portraits made of herself and had a logo designed for her singing career that didn’t even exist. As MaryDee so wisely said in a comment to this post:

“How do you think all these up and coming singers — who have been playing night after night in dingy bars for years and years — feel when they watch you get a show and all of a sudden think you should be this huge star. I never heard that you practiced your singing forever or belonged to any choirs. Basically it was handed to you. You didn’t earn it. Bravo basically gave it to you.”

During season 4, Joe Gorga tells Teresa:

“You need to fall to see what you have done wrong.”

When asked if season 4 is going to be a drama-filled season, Teresa told a viewer that it’s filled with “sad drama” and says,

“You’d have 2B sick to be excited about family & friends falling apart ”

Joe and Melissa Gorga tried desperately to get on the show and failed, so they made an audition tape promising that they would destroy Teresa if Bravo cast Melissa. They are living up to their Bravo contract by trying to do just what they promised, but they are failing miserably.

Teresa’s brother Joe knows he’s wrong, but he makes excuses for his despicable behavior toward his sister by telling himself she deserves it and telling her: “You need to fall to see what you have done wrong.” The question that needs to be asked is:  “What exactly has Teresa done and to whom?” In Joe’s twisted mind, if Teresa falls, he and his manipulative wife will gain her success and fans…this is why he and his wife plotted to destroy Teresa’s reality career.

Joe and Melissa, being true narcissists, are angry that Teresa had the spotlight and not them, but they won’t admit that this is the real reason they resent her. Instead, they lie and claim that she purposely excluded them from her life and family events to prevent them from being on camera. They are conjuring up reasons to show hatred toward her, like saying she is a bad aunt to Joe and Melissa’s children.

They want Teresa’s spotlight, which they believe should have been their spotlight in the first place. The real reason they despise Teresa is because they believe they are deserving of superstar status and see her as standing in their way. Melissa and Joe think that if they convince the viewers that Teresa is a terrible person, they’ll win over her fans and have her success without any other effort. They take digs at Teresa in front of the other casts and in front of the cameras to turn the cast against her and to make Teresa look bad, thinking that if they get the cast and fans to dislike Teresa, they will be liked even more.

Melissa knew she wouldn’t become famous for her own talents, so she plotted with her gullible husband to use Teresa’s fame to get attention. They thought they could just step into Teresa’s spotlight and take her fame. Melissa doesn’t care about Joe’s family and neither does he. They are ruthless people desperate for fame. Melissa is obviously trying to take Teresa’s spot, not just be on her show.

“I can’t lie. Antonia is definitely a little mini me. She loves the spotlight. She’s absolutely gorgeous. And she’s got moves, this little girl. You know, she gets it from her mama.” – Melissa Gorga, RHONJ Season 3, Lost Footage

Back in 2008, when they were filming  the first season, Melissa (commenting as ‘anonymous’ in a blog post about the RHONJ) wrote some pretty hurtful things about the cast, particularly about Teresa:

“One of the pathetic losers that are on this show, is a very close relative of mine. Don’t understand how that show chose her to be on tv. If anyone knows who I might be talking about, what an idiot, clueless mother and a housewive that has no idea what her husband does and who. She definitely needs a reality check.”

“I know one of “housewives” very well. Just from knowing some of the girls on this show I can see why Bravo didn’t pick woman with real money and class they picked the dumb ones with no class and charge cards, it makes for a better show.”

“I know the two sisters on the show and know a third housewive (not so much a housewive at home) I would love to see a show about their so called husbands. I know alot of ones’ husband and he definitely is not too involved with his wife and three kids. But what she don’t know, she will never have a clue about!!!!!!”

“Born and raised in Paterson and and then thinking that she has the wonderful life that these women so called have on this show. This is all just a show because that woman has nothing just a bunch of credit cards with a high balance!!!!!”

“I saw one of the housewives just recently. I don’t need to kiss anyones’ ass especially her. Don’t know wjat definition of beautiful, funny, entertaining your talking about and believe me no one is kissing her ass in this family. She came from nothing and now she thinks she’s living that perfect lifestyle. Believe me everyone in this family is laughing at her. She’s a mess!!!CLUELESS about life! Try having a conversation with her, “what a dumbass”

Melissa trash talked everyone on this blog but Danielle Staub (she may already have been in contact with Danielle as far back as 2008 when they were filming season 1) and then said this about herself and Joe Gorga:

“I met the brother of the Montville housewife. What an awesome guy very successful owns alot of buildings and he is her younger brother. He is very young. Wow!! His house is the most amazing house in Montville, in a very prestigious development. Its an OMG! Cribs doesn’t even have houses like that. He has a beautiful wife and family, she is only 29! living in a house like that! God Bless. If the montville housewife is anything like her brother she should be interesting. Im sure she will be, they must come from a great family. I know of some of the other girls. Im excited to watch the show. When does it come on? [December 21, 2008 12:24 PM]

An insider commenting in a blog on September 17, 2011, said that Melissa had been trying for years to get on RHONJ. Here’s an excerpt from the insider’s blog:

“Missy has been trying to get on Housewives for years. She was envious that not only Tre got on, but that Tre was becoming successful off of the show… When Melissa gets angry, she gets angry. She was tired of being ignored (sociopath) and decided to get dirty; she contacted Danielle initially two years ago. Ultimately, Melissa exchanged phone calls, e-mails, texts, and all forms of communication with Danielle for months upon months. Like Danielle can confirm, Mel was dying to film scenes with her similar to the ones she does with her sisters and Kathy, where she fabricates lies and bitches about Tre… Joey G and Melissa filmed a tape where they, in the style of the Sopranos, promised Bravo execs they would ‘expose’ and ‘destroy’ Teresa. They also guaranteed to give Tre what she has given them ‘…their whole life’.”

An insider (probably the same person) commenting in a different blog in August 2011, said basically the same thing. Here’s an excerpt from the insider’s blog:

“Melissa spent the past three years haunting Bravo and Danielle, trash-talking all of the Housewives but then kissing ass once they got on, then being mad at Teresa for being upset with them after all of that. Imagine your SIL, someone you have to see for the rest of your life, doing this for you – and your jealous and brainwashed friends sticking up for them. NEWSFLASH CAROLINE – Melissa was the one who told Danielle all about your stomach surgery, made the ‘rumors’ of Albert cheating at the Brownstone, and said ‘my daughter would never do that’ about Ashley. Wake the *beep* up.”

“The truth will come out. Melissa tried to be on the show from the very beginning. They did not want her because she was boring. So, she stomped her feet and stalked Danielle Staub to the point where even Danielle (of all people) refused to bring her onto the show. Melissa AND Joe wanted to come on to surprise Teresa and be on-camera friends with Danielle. I wish that did happen because maybe Caroline and Jacqueline would not be believing all of Melissa’s lies like you will see in season four.

“Melissa knows how to lie and get what she wants, but the truth will come out. Her stalking Danielle is what finally got her on the show. A lot of what was also said at season 2′s reunion (with Melissa’s name) was completely removed because, at the time, no one even knew who she was.

“Melissa is a complete fake. She has tried to get on the show; it never happened until she stalked Danielle and made a video WITH Joe (nice brother) saying they will ‘Destroy Teresa’. Yet, they call Teresa garbage for working to support her family and keep a beautiful roof over her family’s head.”

The insider, commenting in the September 2011 blog, said the major issue between Teresa and Joe and Melissa is the way that the Gorgas got on the show. Here’s the excerpt from the insider’s blog that describes the discord:

“The Gorgas (and even Tre) act as if there is this major underlying issue during their vague conversations. There is an elephant in the room that, by contract, none of them can blatantly discuss (or couldn’t) as of yet… There was never a MAJOR issue. That is Bravo trying to make the show interesting, which it is failing at…

“Teresa always tries to make excuses for her brother because she actually loves him, but he is certainly no angel. Joey G and Melissa filmed a tape where they, in the style of the Sopranos, promised Bravo execs they would ‘expose’ and ‘destroy’ Teresa. They also guaranteed to give Tre what she has given them ‘…their whole life.’ The tape was over the top and completely goumba.

“The REAL elephant in the room, and real reason why Tre and Joey G have issues, is the show itself and how Melissa got on. However, by contract, the housewives can’t reference the show.

“Today, Tre can’t stomach Melissa. She actually never liked her before, but there was never an issue as major as this one – the one Missy created. Melissa’s sisters (and family) were all in on it too.”

An insider, ‘HousewivesFan‘, commenting at AllAboutTRH.com on February 16, 2012 at 11:28 pm said that Melissa trying to make up with Teresa is only for the cameras:

A friend of mine knows both the Giudices and Gorgas. She informed me that Joey and Melissa have been trying to get on RHONJ since they saw how successful the show became. Melissa and Teresa are equally to blame about problems the two have had in the past. Teresa and Melissa BOTH take digs at each other, and before Melissa was cast the two were only together at family functions for the kids. When Melissa finally got her wish to be cast on RHONJ, she saw it as her chance to be the star she thinks she is talented enough to be (she thinks she’s the next JLo). Trying to “make up” with Teresa is just for the cameras and she got VERY lucky because Caroline hates Teresa due to her success with the cook book, and they sided together (with Kathy) to bring Teresa down a few pegs. Teresa’s brother Joey resents his sister’s success and feels hurt by her not wanting him and Melissa on the show. Also, Joey is DEEPLY jealous of Teresa’s husband’s relationship with his father and Melissa reminds him of this all the time. Oh, and Caroline doesn’t like Melissa AT ALL but she does like Kathy.

Straight from Melissa’s mouth (her interviews, blogs, Twitter, Facebook, anonymous comments) come her feelings of resentment and envy. She feels entitled to Teresa’s success: it should be her’s because she’s more talented, younger, sexier, better looking, smarter, richer, entertaining and more deserving of the spotlight than her “dumbass,” “clueless,” “pathetic loser” of a sister-in-law.

In interviews and on social media sites, Joe and Melissa claim that Teresa tried to exclude them from her life once she was cast on RHONJ. Joe and Melissa told Life & Style on May 18, 2011:

“Teresa’s never given us any respect. She was being fake, just acting nice for the cameras,” Melissa says.

“My sister didn’t even want to be there [at the christening],” says Joe. “She’d just signed her Housewives contract that morning or the day before because she was mad that we were on the show.”

“I think when Joe and I started making a lot of money is when she really lost it,” says Melissa. “She was used to being the biggest and the best, and then when I came in, she felt threatened. She doesn’t want anyone to one up her. Teresa’s fine with you as long as you’re one step below.”

Things got so bad, the Gorgas found themselves ushered into corners during Housewives tapings, barred from book signings and 300-person premiere parties, and their daughter excluded from birthday parties.

But the most hurtful was when his sister tried turning their parents against Joe and his wife.

“Teresa would tell our parents ‘Melissa this,’ ‘Melissa that’ or ‘Joey didn’t do this,’ and my parents have never been the same,” Joe confides. “Her husband talks about me to them all the time, too.”

In her Bravo blog, High School All Over Again,posted on May 24, 2011, Melissa changed her story about being excluded from events, and said instead that they were invited so Teresa could protect her image but were relegated to the background:

“Joe and I have never once asked Teresa to put us on TV. We were at all the kids’ birthday parties, so of course you would see us in the background sometimes during past seasons. There was no way she wouldn’t invite us to the kids’ parties, what would everyone think? Where is her only brother, right? Of course we were there. Once again it was a ‘technicality,’ but on her part this time. We usually kiss hello and then say goodbye when it’s over.”

Before season 2, on April 23, 2010, when a friend asked if she and Teresa’s brother Joe Gorga would be making an appearance on the show, Melissa posted on Facebook:

“We were at some of the parties but she really didn’t do any thing with her brother or his family….”

They are lying. Melissa is a pathological liar who plays innocent victim while blaming Teresa for her imaginary problems. She will eventually have to face the consequences of her lies, which she will no doubt blame on Teresa again; however, any problems and conflicts she is about to experience will be a direct result of her actions. In other words, karma is coming and she will have brought it to herself. Her faithful and deluded followers and busted posse (which now includes Jacqueline Laurita) buy into her lies, but the majority see right through her.

“I am the most humble person u will ever meet! I would love to meet u! I wouldn’t hurt a fly! I have never lied about anyone!” – Melissa Gorga, Twitter, December 7, 2011

According to the insider who commented on September 17, 2011, “Missy was at nearly every single family function, especially the ones filmed for Bravo:”

“For years, she sent Bravo ‘audition’ tapes, e-mails, and even spoke with producers and assistants in person. No one was interested in her or her husband, who they mocked behind the scenes… The day of the reunion [season 2], after the first Danielle confrontation (there were more), Tre got extreme anxiety – and this is when she started to put all of Missy’s motives together: coming to every family event for camera time while behind the scenes contacting producers, Danielle, and pulling the best act [their Soprano's-style audition tape] which got her on the show – together with Tre’s brother Joey.”

Melissa even made petty complaints to the NY Post about Teresa excluding Antonia from Gia’s birthday party limo in season 2.  On September 3, 2010, the NY Post reported that:

Melissa was pissed off that Teresa wouldn’t allow Melissa’s daughter Antonia to ride in the limo for Gia’s 9th birthday party, which was featured on season 2.

When Gia’s birthday episode aired in June 2010, during season 2, Melissa Marco-Gorga tweeted:

“I didn’t get to watch it yet, i was away this weekend, but we were there that day… I was on it for like 3 seconds when they pulled up in the limo, I was standing on the stairs with my daughter, She didn’t have Antonia ride in the limo with the other girls…”

Gia is five years older than Antonia, so Melissa should not have expected a 4-year-old (at the time) to be invited to join the older group in the limo.

Melissa’s expressed her true feelings in her very first Bravo blog of season 3 ( No Fakers, May 16, 2011,); of course, this was before she knew viewers could see that she was hating on Teresa because she and Joe were jealous that Teresa was on TV:

Some of you may be very confused right now. You may be thinking, “Teresa has a brother?” Before all the press, you probably didn’t know we existed, did you? Well here we are!

I know the episode is a bit confusing at first. You’re probably wondering why Joe acted the way he did when his sister came up to him. It’s understandable so let me explain. Teresa has kept my husband, Joe, and his family (me and my three children) away from everything she has been going through and everything that has been so exciting in her life for the last three years.

She has never been happy for her brother or cared about anything good going on in his life or his children’s. She only wants to discuss her life and only cares about herself. She kept us as far away during Season 1 and Season 2, because I think she knew this would happen when they found us. Karma is a bitch.

Family comes first for me, but unfortunately it does not for her, and it never will. It’s just not who she is, and that’s OK, but don’t think we are going to go on national TV and be fake with you. We are not fakers, sorry.

When Teresa says she was her brother’s best friend before he got married, I believe that was true. She probably was. She was the only girl around, and there was no one else to share the spotlight with. Teresa likes to be the center of attention. Be beneath her or get the hell out of her way. Well she has met her match!

My sisters and Joe have an amazing relationship. He feels they act more like sisters to him than his own does. When Teresa called my sister Lysa for advice because we didn’t want to talk to her anymore, I warned my sister not to talk to her.

I will say that the fight did happen the last half hour of the night, and yes, he was drinking. We were celebrating our son, it’s very normal for us to have a good time and let loose at a party. But he knew exactly what he was doing, and he was not completely hammered. He just drank a lot by that time of the night. Did you see Joe with his niece, Gia? He is the best uncle in the world. You can see how much Gia loves him written all over her face.

The one thing he regrets is calling his sister garbage. He doesn’t remember saying that, and it is not in his character to say that. Yes, he is completely disappointed with the way she treats him and his family, but he would never want to call her garbage. That is still his sister at the end of the day. He does love her. And so do I.

After reading the responses from viewers to her first Bravo blog, Melissa realized she was coming across as envious of Teresa’s celebrity, so in her second Bravo blog (High School All Over Again, May 24, 2011), she claimed that Joe never wanted to be on camera and that they were not jealous of Teresa:

“Joe and I have never once asked Teresa to put us on TV…To be perfectly honest with you, Joe never wanted to be around the cameras. We were happy for her when she got the show, and I told her she should do it. It might be easy to think that we were jealous that she was on TV, but that is not the case.”

Melissa is a hypocrite. While ‘thanking Jesus,’ she is breaking at least two of The Ten Commandments:

1. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.

2. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s.

Let’s revisit:
:09 Jorga the Barbarian yells walk away to Teresa for 30 seconds
:37 Jorga calls his sister garbage
1:00 Jorga bangs violently on the table and jumps out of his seat and has to be restrained as Teresa is walking away.
1:15 Watch closely who moves first. Remember, Juicy was standing there, Jorga was restrained. If Juicy jumped first, he would have been able to get to Jorga because no one was holding him back. JORGA lunges. Juicy is being restrained by women this entire time. Jorga is restrained by several men. If Juicy really wanted to fight, nothing was stopping him.
2:09 Jorga pushes his own wife.
2:18 Melissa says “all I can see is Juicy charging” (really?) and makes the comment “you don’t charge a man and his wife and think my husband is just going to sit there.” Exactly. Jorga jumped up, Jorga lunged at Juicy.
3:23 Fight across the room from Juicy. Yet Juicy is at fault.
3:30 LOL, Melissa kicking and screaming
4:10 Jorga is pointing and yelling in Juices sister’s face: “your brother is a piece of shit”
4:32 The “we pay our bills” line is heard…
And the best for last:
5:20 Sounds like Teresa and Joe’s mom yelling: “Joey, what are you doing to our family?”
So Juicy has done some pretty shitty things, but this video is so telling.
[Squeezy, May 6, 2012, Reality Tea]

Lysa ‘Don’t Get It Twisted’ Simpson said to Joe Gorga at his son’s christening after he verbally abused his sister Teresa:

“Look at me, look at your sister, your real sister.”

Melissa Gorga blamed the brawl at the christening on Joe Giudice when Joe Gorga is the one who started it by calling Teresa garbage, telling Teresa to walk the f*ck away, banging on the table and then jumping up as if to go after her. Joe Giudice stood by watching until Joe Gorga jumped up toward Teresa. Of course he is going to protect his wife from her drunken brother and the other instigators, the three Marco sisters. Throughout season 3 Joe and Melissa demanded an apology from Teresa for the christening fight when Joe and Melissa were the ones who should have been apologizing to the Teresa, her parents, and her children (Gia was standing beside Teresa when Joe Gorga did all those things to her).

It is clear that Teresa loves Joe.  During season one she mentioned him during her talking head interview when she flipped a table;  during season 2 she announced to the entire crowd at her housewarming party how much she loved her brother (it didn’t air season 2, but was included in season 3), and she made a scene with Danielle at the reunion telling her not to bring up her family… namely Melissa and Joe and baby Joey. During season 3 she was genuinely and obviously sad that her relationship with her brother was broken (i.e. the book signing) when it used to be so good. Joe Gorga, on the other hand, treats his sister like crap: calling her garbage, putting dirty laundry on national TV, being a famewhore, and not going to his goddaughter’s and niece’s birthday party, who he claims on TV to LOVE SO MUCH (and publicly stating on twitter that he wished he was invited to the Gia’s quiet party). Joe Gorga tweeted a complaint that he was not invited to Gia’s party, trying to slam Teresa and shame her for not inviting him. It is pretty appalling that he did not attend the party but attended an event for DWTS’ Maksim’s birthday – they had to buy tickets to attend – which was held on the same day as Gia’s party.

Caroline rules the Manzo/Laurita clan. Jacqueline was her own person in season 1, but Chris, under Caroline’s direction, put a stop to that. Jacqueline is now just a puppet to Caroline, who has never liked Teresa [she was Dina's friend for 15 years and Caroline barely knew her when they began filming season 1] and was looking for a way to take her down. She got the perfect opportunity when Bravo cast Melissa and Kathy as Teresa’s nemeses. Dina is not Caroline’s puppet, which is one of the reasons they are not speaking.

Joe Gorga says “you’re gonna get the truth” in season 4, and Melissa says you’ll get the backstory in season 4 to show why there was so much tension in season 3 (see video below).

Since season 4 was taped while season 3 was airing, we should expect to get an amped up version of season 3, for which Joe and Melissa have no regrets.

Joe said being on RHONJ has been “good and bad” and that next season will be “wild and fun” (Reality Aired, February 8, 2012).

Teresa said (video below): “Being on the housewives is stressful….working with my family is something I’m not a fan of. Being on Celebrity Apprentice was a breath of fresh air. Season 4….this one, like, I have to say tops the cake….but very sad you know, yeah….an eye opener….when you think you know someone…there’s alot of people, they feel like when no one’s listening, they want to be heard.” (Associated Press, January 6, 2012)

Joe and Melissa are narcissists and pathological liars (Caroline suffers from obsessive compulsive personality disorder). The following is a good description of their personalities.

Narcissist or Sociopath? What’s the Difference?

Pathological narcissism is a life-long pattern of traits and behaviours which signify infatuation and obsession with one’s self to the exclusion of all others and the egotistic and ruthless pursuit of one’s gratification, dominance and ambition. As distinct from healthy narcissism which we all possess, pathological narcissism is maladaptive, rigid, persisting, and causes significant distress and functional impairment. Between 0.5-1% of the general population are diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Most narcissists (50-75%, according to the DSM-IV-TR) are men.

By Lisa E. Scott
June 22, 2009

Both the Narcissist & the Sociopath have absolutely no remorse and no conscience. They both view others as nothing more than objects to be used as a means to an end. However, the way they use others is what differentiates them.

A Narcissist demands his sense of self be propped-up by others on a continual basis. This is because he is disconnected from himself and has no sense of self. Without validation and recognition from the outside world, a Narcissist feels dead inside.

A Narcissist has a very fragile ego and is extremely insecure. He needs others to reflect his image back to him in order to feel alive. A Narcissist is addicted to the spotlight and craves attention and adoration like a drug. He has an insatiable need to be recognized for his achievements, no matter how small or insignificant. He is grandiose and views himself as much more accomplished than he really is…basically, he is delusional and not in touch with reality. He believes other people worship him when, in actuality, most people see right through him.

A Narcissist has a sense of entitlement that is unsurpassed. He demands to be idealized by others. If you do not revere him, he will lash out at you. If you do not agree with him, he will retaliate against you. He has no moral code and no conscience. He simply cannot help himself. If you do not admire, adore and revere him, he will devalue and discard you with no remorse.

A Narcissist only surrounds himself with people who agree with everything he says and worship the ground he walks on. To watch a Narcissist in the workplace is pathetic. It is a fascinating study in human behavior, to say the least.

The underbelly of a narcissist is a scary thing. He feels nothing but contempt and jealousy towards others, especially those who may pose a threat to him. Anyone he perceives as a threat will be swiftly removed from his court. He views others as objects in his quest for dominance. Because he has no conscience, a Narcissist is often quite successful in business and other areas where cut-throat behavior is required in order to get ahead.

Narcissists view others as objects, but not quite in the same sense that Sociopaths regard others as objects. A Narcissist is reliant on others to stroke his fragile ego and feed his insatiable need for validation. He relies on others to maintain his peace of mind and sense of self. Without reassurance from others, he feels dead inside.

A Narcissist constantly seeks reassurance of his superiority, and especially as he ages, his virility. A Narcissist does not age gracefully. He becomes very desperate for reassurance. Desperate people have no boundaries. They will break the law and hurt others regardless of the consequences.

A Narcissist invests all of his energy into ensuring others validate his fragile ego. He lives in a frantic state of paranoia that he will be exposed at any minute. Consumed with avoiding this inevitable disaster, he has little energy to be genuinely interested in others.

A Sociopath, on the other hand, is quite different. To begin with, a Sociopath has no need to be validated by others. Unlike a Narcissist, a Sociopath has no underlying neediness for others approval. His remorseless behavior does not stem from a deep insecurity, like a Narcissist. Instead, he desires to exploit others simply for his entertainment and amusement.

Both a Narcissist and a Sociopath use others as objects, but a Sociopath is more exploitive. A Narcissist desperately needs others to validate him. He will only exploit those who pose a threat to him. His remaining victims (the ones who stroke his ego and provide supply) are vital to his sense of self. Without these people in his life worshipping him at all times, he will crumble.

A Sociopath has no need for others to validate his existence. He sees others as play things. The main character in the show “Dexter” is a perfect example of a Sociopath. He has no need for others except to the extent they can provide amusement to him. He exploits others to see what he can get away with because he finds it thrilling and exciting.

I have learned that the fundamental difference between the two is this:

A Narcissist sees others as a means to validate his existence. The less validating you are, the less use you are to a Narcissist.

A Sociopath views others as entertainment. The less entertaining you are, the less use you are to a Sociopath.

Both the Narcissist and the Sociopath need to dominate and control others. They will both exploit you with no remorse and have no conscience. My advice? Do not validate the Narcissist and do not entertain the Sociopath. Stay clear of them. Once they suck you in, it is hard to get away. Avoid them both at all costs and if they manage to bring you into their den, run like hell.

Criteria for the Narcissistic Personality Disorder:

• Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates accomplishments, talents, skills, contacts, and personality traits to the point of lying, demands to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements);

• Is obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, fame, fearsome power or omnipotence, unequaled brilliance (the cerebral narcissist), bodily beauty or sexual performance (the somatic narcissist), or ideal, everlasting, all-conquering love or passion;

• Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can only be understood by, should only be treated by, or associate with, other special or unique, or high-status people (or institutions);

• Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation – or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (Narcissistic Supply);

• Feels entitled. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or her unreasonable expectations for special and favourable priority treatment;

• Is “interpersonally exploitative”, i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends;

• Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with, acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences, priorities, and choices of others;

• Constantly envious of others and seeks to hurt or destroy the objects of his or her frustration. Suffers from persecutory (paranoid) delusions as he or she believes that they feel the same about him or her and are likely to act similarly;

• Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent, omniscient, invincible, immune, “above the law”, and omnipresent (magical thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by people he or she considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

On February 26, 2012, regarding the Oscars, Melissa tweeted:

“Do you hear the screams when the stars walk onto the carpet!! It must feel amazing for them, God Bless them!”

According to PriscillaFromWasilla on October 17, 2011, Melissa’s song ‘On Display,’ which she wrote (along with a co-writer) before filming her first season on RHONJ (season 3), is an anthem to narcissism:

“Throughout the season we have wondered about Melissa’s song On Display, which when you get right down to it, is an anthem to narcissism. We have no idea when she wrote it, but we are 100% positive that when she did, she was not at all on display. She was a garden variety housewife and mother in Northern, New Jersey. If she wrote this song after she was on the show and a staple of supermarket weeklies, you could make a case that Melissa is troubled by being hunted by the paparazzi. But if you consider the fact that she wrote the song before anyone outside of her tiny circle knew her name, you have to wonder if she is actually fantasizing about what it’d be like to famous. Then the line, “slander my name in all the papers, that’s what you wanna do, but you keep watching, I’ll keep glowing, that’s what I’ll do for you,” practically defines the core of narcissism: any attention, good or bad, is better than anonymity.”

Melissa co-wrote the song ‘On Display’ before her first season on RHONJ aired, when only those within her tiny circle knew her name. It’s reasonable to imagine that Melissa was stalking Teresa’s whole life since 2008, the year season 1 was filmed, and wrote the lyrics as if she were Teresa:

Verse 1:
I can feel the weight of the world pushing down on me
I can feel every one’s eyes watching me
I can feel the heat of the spotlight shine on me
And I can feel the pressure on my body
Got me feeling all these feelings and it’s driving me insane
Paparazzi watching me do my thing

Chorus:
Cause I’m on display, on display, on display
Each and every day, every day, every day
Everybody’s waiting on me to fall
Everybody’s waiting on me to crawl but they can keep on
(Waiting on me, Waiting on me, Waiting on me to fall) 4X

Verse 2:
I know you’re gonna try to bring me, bring me down
But I’m a fighter, I’m a tiger I can figure it out
Slander my name in all the papers that’s what you wanna do
But you keep watching I’ll keep glowing that’s what I’ll do for you
Got me feeling all these feelings and it’s driving me insane
Paparazzi watching me do my thing

Obvious Lee on 20 Apr, 2012 at 6:38 pm said at Reality Tea:

She had all the poses, smiles and red carpet interviews practiced for years in front of the mirror . She could “feel the weight of the world pushing down on her” before she was on air! Imagine that.